Why do I bother trying to help people!

Hiyyah Everyone 

When will I learn?

Although my partners brother is a disrespectful jerk to me most of the time I still tried to help him out!

He is wanting to find his own place and trust me when I say we want him to find his own place ASAP.

So although he is mean to me all the time I still wanted to help him find a nice place and I know someone who rents.

It also turns out that our landlord and landlady are looking to buy another property to rent and they are super nice and super good.

So I tried my best to sort out what he wants, where he wants, basically everything he wants and what do I get?

Not a thanks, not a I really appreciate it. Nope! instead I got complaints and him saying that he isn’t just going to move into the first place.

I said to him that they are looking for a place that is exactly what he wants.

But I am regretting it now because it’s going to look bad on me when he either lets them down on complains.

He honestly dosen’t live in the real world I have pretty much got him a fully furnished 2 bed house for Β£450- Β£500 a month rent and he complains abou that.

I asked him where he wanted to live and told them then when we got back today he was changing his mind.

He thinks the world revolves around him and I am sick of it!

I don’t want to waste there time when they are looking especially for him.

I even asked if he could pay his bond in instalments and because I know them they said they would sort something for him…. but guess what he isn’t happy with that.

So I’m done!

 Anytime I try to help I try it either gets thrown back in my face or makes me look really  bad  and I’m not doing it anymore!

I have low enough self esteem that I don’t need to be made to look bad because I’m so close to rock bottom that I’m going to just be pushed over the edge.

Then maybe someone would listen and appreciate what I do or try and do for them.

They have no clue how poorly I am. I am so suicidal it’s unreal and this situation has made me feel totally worthless.
I’m done! I know I say that but I think I can’t help myself so I want to help others.

I will only help people who actually appreciate my help because I get so stressed out trying to help everyone when I need to put my little family first!
Thanks for reading 

Have a good day 

Xx

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