A trip to see the physciatric doctor.

Hiyyah everyone.

So today I went to see my physciatrist this morning. (Now yesterday as I didn’t realise it didn’t post)

I have been feeling really bad lately… I mean horrendous. 

Mentally I’m done.

So I have had my medication increased and adjusted.

We will see if it helps.

My next appointment is in November so we shall see if there is any change.

I hope there is because I can’t continue to feel this way.

I’m lucky that he is really nice because my CPN couldn’t make it today because of personal reasons.

At least he reads the notes so I don’t have to try remember everything that I’ve been through before I saw him last.

Thanks for reading 

Have a nice day 

Xx


Photography Challenge day 25

Hiyyah everyone.

Well I am so behind on my photography challenge that I’m going to have to do 3 days in one day.

So day 25 photography challenge was artwork.

I decided to take a photo of my adult colouring book because the design was amazing.

Here is photography challange day 25 subject artwork.


Day 26 photography challenge is Transportation.

You will get to see my 1st baby my Mini. I love my car. 

Thanks for reading.

Enjoy your day 

Xx

Nobody trusts me with my own child!

Hiyyah everyone 

So ever since my support worker came on Thursday and told me I should put Milly in nursery when lee isn’t with me.

Well ever since then I have felt like I’m useless.

A useless mummy.

Useless at everything.

If somebody who is supposed to be helping you says that you should put you baby in nursery. 

you are going to think that they don’t trust you with your child.

I do everything for my baby.

Yes we don’t have the best bond at the moment but putting her in nursery would make that worse.

Yes I do struggle being a mummy but bring me a parent who dosen’t.

It broke my heart when she said this.

I felt defeated.

Ever since then it plays on my Brain 24 hours a day.

I am petrified to make mistakes.

I am not putting my child in nursery.

I can look after her when lee isn’t here.

I basically look after her when he is here.

If I was struggling I have family I can go to.

I took what she said really really hard.

I was in a dark place anyway.

Now I feel I have nothing to live for when people don’t even think I can look after my own baby.

How would you feel if this was said to you?

Would you take it like I did?

Thanks for reading.

I hope you have all enjoyed your long weekend.

Xx

Photography challenge day 24

Hiyyah everyone 

I hope you’re all enjoying the bank holiday weekend.

Shame about the weather tho.

Not that I should expect sunshine I do live in England.

Anyway I kind of struggled with today’s photography challange.

Because I wasn’t exactly sure A) what it meant or B) what I was supposed to take a photo of.

So I searched it on the Internet.

And…

I’m still not sure what I was supposed to take a photo of.

 I read that gratitude is what you are thankful for.

Well I am thankful that my Grandma gets to spend time with Milly and watch her grow.

I’m also thankful they can make each other smile.

So here is my photography challenge for today.

Subject Gratitude.

Tomorrow’s photography challenge is Artwork.

This one should be easy.

Thanks for reading.

Night.

Xx

Photograpy challange day 23 

Hiyyah everyone 

I actually remembered to do today’s photography challange.

Today’s photo challenge was In your closet.

Well I didn’t do my closet because mine is a mess.

Or 

I did photograph my clothes and I just got a bit dryer happy and shrunk all my clothes.

Only joking.

I wish I had that many clothes.

This is inside Milly’s closet or wardrobe as I would call it.


Tomorrow’s challenge is Gratitude.

I’m not totally sure what this means so I will have to search it.

Thanks for reading 

Night 

Xx

I wonder if anybody would actually notice if I wasn’t here.

Hi everyone.

I was thinking about this earlier.

I know bad move..

Letting myself think.

I was thinking I honestly wonder if people would actually notice if I wasn’t here.

I think they would notice certain things like the housework not being done and that nobody is running around trying to keep them happy etc.

But I believe that the wouldn’t notice if me as a person wasn’t around.

I think they could just replace me easily and I would be forgotten about within a day.

They might realise that there life has got a little harder in someways but a little easier in others.

I do feel nobody would really care about me as a physical person they would just care about what wasn’t being done for them.

I know how sad that sounds.

But that’s not even the worse thing my brain thinks about this is mild.

Thanks for reading.

Have a nice evening.

Because this was a sad post I thought I would put a happy photo up.

Xx

Yesterdays Photography challenge day 22

Hiyyah everyone 

I did forget about my photography challenge yesterday but I had a terrible day yesterday.

Mentally I was just done yesterday so the last thing on my mind was to take photos.

This morning was a little different an Idea of what to do for yesterday’s challange popped into my head.

It was a true light bulb moment.

Like if I was in a cartoon a lightbulg would have come above my head.

It was honestly like that.

Yesterday’s photography challange was Clothing.

I didn’t take a photo of my clothing because milly’s is much cuter.

We all need a bit of cuteness in our lives.

Today’s photography challange is In your closet. 

So I will try do this later but we have another busy day.

That’s all my life is. stressful.

Thanks for reading 

Enjoy the bank holiday weekend.

Xx